Recently, I went to one of those *yawn* art festivals. Not the Coconut Grove
one, which is actually interesting, but the South Miami one, which seems
to be more of a excuse to close off a street and let yuppies waddle around
on it smoking cigars.
While dodging the bored families with screaming children (all wearing purple
wristbands for some reason I could not figure out?) and people walking their
dogs, I noticed that most of the artists who were displaying their wares
at this show had a little elegantly framed thing hanging up with their 'Artist's
Statement'. I decided to write my own, although it didn't come to me until
a few minutes ago just how to put it to words. A bit of caffiene was also
required.
My artwork was originally a means of expression for use in a world where
rational expression is too easily misunderstood, but pure insanity speaks
straight to the heart, liver, and pancreas. Through the beauty of confusion
and hilarious destruction, I found that an ideal world could be created in
the mind of the observer, and then cheerfully transformed to a substance
not unlike cheese.
Grotesquely modified occurences in the plane of reality and explosions of
plumbing are highly influential in my style. The impossible is made possible,
through flagrant violations of the laws of physics and possibly even the
ordinances of the city of Coral Gables.
Most of my scribblings are done on a computer. In the digital world, I exclusively
use open-source software, as most commercial products are not licensed for
use in modifying the fabric of space-time. I've abandoned the use of the
Windows operating system, as it could not survive the repeated transition
from matter to pudding. Any limitations in my techniques, software, or shiny
toys have been compensated for through the liberal use of nonsense.
Although I would like to incorporate them into my work, I feel that I cannot
accurately portray the inner wombatitude of the fiddler crab, so that's right
out.
HAIL ERIS!
You may make any assumptions about that you wish.
You may go
back, or
somewhere else entirely.